HE TOLD ME A SECRET BUT… I WILL TELL YOU ABOUT IT

This morning, the Lord told me, “Mide, do you know the secret of the life of Joseph?” I responded, “No Lord, I know his story but not his secret” The Lord said, I will tell you… It will help you on this journey…

Joseph was “almost” the last born with just a younger brother called Benjamin. Joseph had many brothers, well-grown brothers who were authorities over him. Joseph had a doting father, who cared for him and showed a special affection for him then Joseph had the GIFT of DREAMS. He could dream. Unfortunately, he was only able to dream but couldn’t interpret them.

One day….

Joseph had a dream, and when he told it to his brothers, they hated him all the more. He said to them, “Listen to this dream I had: We were binding sheaves of grain out in the field when suddenly my sheaf rose and stood upright, while your sheaves gathered around mine and bowed down to it.”

Then he had another dream, and he told it to his brothers…

 “Listen,” he said, “I had another dream, and this time the sun and moon and eleven stars were bowing down to me.”

When he told his father as well as his brothers, his father rebuked him and said, “What is this dream you had? Will your mother and I and your brothers actually come and bow down to the ground before you?” His brothers were jealous of him, but his father kept the matter in mind.

At the time Joseph was having these dreams, he only was able to remember but not interpret. He was 17, naïve and the dreams were a bit clear. They needed no interpretation.

Then they sold him to kill his dreams. They thought, if we sell him as a slave, his dreams will die.

Joseph was sold out and he ended up in the prison. From the prison, he moved to the throne as a prime minister in Egypt. The second most influential role anybody could hold in Egypt. He was a stranger, a slave and a prisoner.

But something happened….

The king of Egypt had a DREAM and he was troubled so much that he needed someone to interpret the dream. Someone “REFFERED” Joseph and Joseph was able to meet with the King.

Joseph had GROWN by then. He moved from being a DREAMER to being an INTERPRETER… Fortunately, his interpretation was confirmed and he rose to the exalted position of a prime minister…

The Lord told me, he said “Mide, did any of your pastor ever told you that Joseph’s GIFT got him the position?” I said no. He said “Joseph was sold to you as a child of luck and grace but never a child who worked on his gift”. He said, “The grace of God can place you in front of an opportunity but your skills, your preparation, your talent will give you the opportunity”

If Joseph hadn’t improved on himself, he wouldn’t have been able to be useful to the King and he wouldn’t have gotten to that position…

God gives us gifts. We all have Talents. He said “Mide, I have given every man a Talent. Something to set them apart. I have built them for a purpose but I won’t compel them to use the talent. They must be awake in the spirit to know the talent. They must work to hone the talent. They must do their part. I have done my part and I am not going to do their parts for them.

He said… my grace works without hindrance. If Joseph had been sold to Syria, the King of Syria would have had the dream that the King of Egypt had. The king of Egypt was not a believer but he had the dream because it was time for me to showcase Joseph.

Then he said… Your Gift will make way for you. He went further; I need you to also learn some other things…

NUMBER 1

It took seven years for the dream to come to pass. Seven years of plenty and seven years of famine. He said “Mide, in those seven years, Cannan and other states cum countries had plenty to eat. It was a period of waste. A period of merriment but it was in that period that Egypt saved most… Mide, in your period of plenty, you must learn to save in other to triumph over your period of famine.

NUMBER 2

He said “Do you noticed that the first disapproval Jospeh got was from his own people. His family, his blood. When your vision is too big, people will attack it. People will shut you up and try to shut you down. Never let that stop you from improving. Never let it stop you from believing in your dreams. No one can stop your dream except YOU.

NUMBER 3

Do you also notice that despite the fact that he was sold into slavery, I orchestrated his move to the throne. I didn’t stop. I worked with Pharaoh’s heart and gave him a disturbing dream. I made sure Jospeh was called upon. Mide, never ever forget that despite the hurdles, the tribulations and the trials, that I will never leave you alone. I am with you. I will walk and work with you. I will bring whatever I have promised you to pass. I don’t look at people’s opinion to fulfill my promise. I am always going to make it work for you.

NUMBER 4

He said “Joseph was referred by someone who had been in contact with him in the prison. Someone who knows him and understands his core strength. What is your core strength Olamide? Every day, I bring people into your life. They see you, meet you and have an impression about you but what is their impression? What do you do? What is your strength? Your core competence? Your skill? Your area of specification? Can people refer you? For what will they refer you?

NUMBER 5

Do you also know that I blessed Jospeh based on his TALENT, just like many people have been famous and wealthy for their Talents… Ronaldo, Opray and so many famous people who rose to the position of prominence through their talents. Do you know why so many stars have gone dim? Because those who were meant to identify and nurture them have killed them.

You are a mother Olamide, I have given Talents to your children. I need you to identify the talent and nurture it. Don’t kill it. Don’t look down on it. Don’t tell your daughter “You talk too much”. Don’t tell your son “You sing too much” Don’t rebuke them for telling you dreams. Don’t kill the spirit I have placed in them..

When the Lord was done with me… he said “Set forth… The time is now”

He speaks to me EVERYDAY… I have a personal relationship with him that extends beyond synagogues and religious gratification… I listen to him and I have seen him do wonders for me…

Is he also talking with you?

AUDACITY TO BE DIFFERENT

Never let the outer Noise drown you inner voice

This morning, I held my son’s hand as I prepare him for school and told him “You know, you don’t have to fit in, you know you have absolute right to be different?” He shook his head affirmatively.

This week, I had a lengthy discussion with an older friend on phone and I told him “I do not intend to raise normal kids”. By all standards, I want to raise a completely different kid from what the society is preaching.

I have often asked, who made some rules we are bending to? Why must I follow these rules?

My driver had an issue with my driving. He thinks it’s absurd to use two legs to drive an automatic car. “That is not how to drive automatic. Just use one leg to drive.” He blurted out. I looked at him and asked. Who made the rule?

I have been driving my automatic for two years with two legs and I have not killed anyone, I have not been arrested once and I have not broken any rules (Well, at least I have not been caught breaking any rules)

Majority of us are trying hard to fit into a non-existent rules ​that the society foist on us. We have not even asked the right questions. Why should I and why shouldn’t I? What would happen and what wouldn’t. We are just following the crowd.

And most times, because you dared to be different, because you dared to make your own rules, people will suddenly start picking fights. Like seriously, I don’t need to think the way you think. If you would ask me, I don’t want to think the way you think.

So, people try to pretend to be who they are not for years, they try to fit in and blend with the norm, they feel little and unfit to challenge the rules and ask questions that could lead to freedom.

People just blend in. They listen to the outer noise and neglect the inner voice. They lose their identity and when they realize it’s gone, it’s always late.

I do not know how I came about my “rebellious” attitude but I have always challenged rules. Some rules holding you back are non-existent.

Some ladies still think being single and buying a car will chase a husband material away. I rather think any man that will run because you have a car doesn’t operate on the same frequency with you. Echo and Noise isn’t the same thing.

Unknowingly, some of us are passing the same hindrance to our children. You tell your son to go to Church, he asked you why and you answered “Because I said so”. That is the dumbest answer to give an inquisitive child. You should tell them why they should go to church and not force them to go to church.

Just so we know, the society can never be better than the mindset of its inhabitants.

A growing society is a product of a growing mind. Don’t fit in. Be different.

...FRIENDS APART, DIGNITY IN LABOUR

When people come into my life, I don't let them go easily. I treasure every memory of them that I have left. I don't do friends but the few ones I have, I can literally "kill" for them.

As the norm, there are friends we have who are closer to us, there are those who have crossed the acquaintance line but they are still not our bosom friends. Back in the university, I kept quite a number of friends who were more than acquaintances.

There was this particular guy back then, I just liked him. Back then in school, something about him quietly screamed "Once a bad guy". I think I have asked him couple of times if he had his ear pierced and he said No but I saw the glaring signs.

I love guys with studs in their ears but not tattoos. My ex got a stud in his ear because of me. When I tried it with Tosin, he went spiritual speaking in diverse tongues. He said that thought was from a pit of HELL and any man that use stud will go to Hell-fire.

When I had my beautiful son, I wanted him to use stud and Tosin told me "I am free to go to Hell-fire alone but I shouldn't drag anyone along 
Sometimes, I wondered how we met sef.. lol

Sorry for the digression... Back to my story...

He was a friend to a friend and those guys were just like my faraway family. We bonded like family and it was usual for us to talk every now and then.

Two months back, I saw a fully dressed LASTMA guy walked out of a Bank as I tried to lock the car. He caught my attention. This guy looks perfectly like my University friend.

He saw me, took his eyes off and walked away. I did a double check. "I am not mistaken or am i?" I couldn't get an answer.

On my way out of the Bank, I told myself it wasn't him but someone who shared a striking resemblance with him. As I was driving off after the bank transaction, our eyes met again. He was at his duty point. He looked away. Completely ignored me. Oh, I missed my friend. I thought, as I drove off.

Today, I was around the area again and I saw him at his duty point. He was directing vehicles and there was a bit of traffic build-up.

I looked at him, except for the fact that he has added weight; he looked exactly like my University friend. I tried to check his ear out but I couldn't.

Immediately I got to his side, I asked if he was once a Ladokite. "Did you Schooled in Lautech?" I asked.

He smiled, took his hand into my car and shook my hand then he said "Lammy". I screamed. I actually screamed my lungs out.

It was quick. Cars were behind me and impatiently blaring. I drove off and suddenly this sadness enveloped me.

He knew me all along. He knew me when he saw me at the bank. He knew me when our eyes met again and he just acted like he didn't. Why will anybody do that? No, this is totally unacceptable.

I wanted to turn back and asked that we go out for lunch and catch up with life but it isn't worth it.

My friends should see me after many years of separation and feel comfortable slapping me and patting me at the same time. There is no point nurturing this friendship again.

Some things are better left as they were.

I feel sad though.

SmartWork Or HardWork

Let's have a cerebral discussion... We all can learn from each other.

I have always believed that so many factors contribute to what a child will turn out to be in life. Aside God-factor, I know the family a child is born into, The schools they attended, The friends they made, the neighborhood (environment and country inclusive) they grew up goes a long way to mold his future. This is my truth.

I also believe this goes a long way to determine the orientation of a child. Our generation had some training from our parents and that has changed our orientation. Some of us went to school carrying slates and chalks. Some had to cut grass for being late and some even had it rough fetching water from the stream.

This new generation will not understand majority of what we experienced. A slate makes no meaning to my son who got his own tablet at age 2. Washing clothes and fetching water makes no sense to my son because there is a washing machine and taps everywhere in the house that supply water. I deviated. Let’s get back to the discussion.

I started my education from a Public Primary school (Methodist Primary School) and I was told to withdraw because I was not staying in class. At age four, I went back home. For two years, I served my punishment by staying at home. At age six, my father did me a huge favour. He enrolled me in one of the best Private Nursery school in my state to start from Nursery one. You see, that singular favour changed my life. That singular favour molded me to be ME.

I met fantastic people there whose friendship I still have till date. My talents were discovered and I must say I was groomed to be the best. I remember my younger brother had a very rough time at Christ School until my dada changed his school to a private secondary school. That “Change” actually made him a PILOT today.

I however believe that we need to unlearn so many things. Some of us are becoming the parents our parents were. We are interchanging smart upbringing with hard upbringing. When we went to schools, we had it rough and tough. Teachers bullied us to silence. We were seen but not heard. University education was worse. Lecturers slept with a lot of girls and messed up their lives.

The country we lived in contributed to it. There is a culturally roadblock that says an elder is always right. There is culturally hurdle of silence. That empowered a lot of evil to thrive.

However, while we are still basking in the glory of the 18^th century, where a child needs to go to school and walk a long distance before he can get knowledge, some people are already living in the present. They sit at home or in the convenience of their offices and attend classes virtually. Online Virtual class, either real-time or recorded.

It’s however unfortunate that our children will also compete with these children who finds live easy and amusing just like we are competing with the likes of Zuckerberg. It’s hard to try to judge a child who grew up under a constrained environment with no opportunity to succeed with another who had life practically read out like a script.

See, it’s hard enough for us to raise kids in this clime. I have always loved Nigeria. Never has it crossed my mind to relocate but sincerely, I have thought about the future of my two kids in comparison with the same child in Canada or USA. I have told myself repeatedly that it’s a great disservice to expect the same excellent return from my son in comparison to a Jude’s son in Atlanta.

I then realized that it’s completely wrong to judge my son based on the old yardstick my parents used. In our parent’s days, Entrepreneurship wasn’t a thing of joy. Life was written in sequential order. Go to school, get education, earn a degree, graduate and look for a job. It wasn’t about starting your company. It was about looking for a job.

Today, the tide has changed. Digital revolution is taking place. The whole system is completely fizzled. The greatest car hire industry doesn’t have a car of its own. The biggest store doesn’t have a shop. Amazon works virtually yet has no physical store. We now have driver-less cars. You can now earn a degree without entering the class. It’s a crazy revolution.

We cannot afford to drive our kids hard without driving them smart. Unlike the old time of Hardwork, it should be SmartWork now. Hardwork won’t pay all the bills. Smartwork will.
It’s completely wicked to leave our kids at the same analogue mode of thinking and expect them to be better positioned than a child who schooled in Europe and comes back home to pick a lucrative job.

We need to help our kids sieve through the needless criteria and prioritize what is good what them. If we can’t give them the opportunity to see the world through another continent, we should not enmesh them in our old unproductive ways.

If we want a better future for our kids, we should give them a better script.

THE CAMOUFLAGE OF LOVE AND BROKENNESS OF TRUTH

Internet has brought along many advantages and one of it is the fact that the world no longer looks big. The world is already a village where everyone lives apart but communicates in nanoseconds. Facebook, Instagram, WhatsApp and even Satellite Television have made it possible to connect to people real-time online. The barrier is broken. Happenings and events around the world affects us all now.

In a nutshell, all sensational news is another reason to birth writers and orators. Everyone is a genius in their own right. Since there is a free platform, everyone wants to outshine the other in the race of opinion. It’s becoming an unhealthy competition.

In just two days, I have seen over 30 updates from people who claimed to have been depressed at one point in time. Everyone is suddenly a master at treating depression and mental instability. Speak out is the new chorus. From the end of the street to the other, from Facebook to Twitter, I have seen over a thousand “Speak Out” updates and I ask, are we still living in this clime? Speak out to whom?

In less than 48 hours, some people have seen reasons to drag this administration through the mud just because a precious life was wasted. Oh, it’s recession. It’s this, it’s that. Buhari is evil. They say, sometimes, when the foolish keep quiet in the gathering of the wise, he will be mistaken for a wise man. If you have no facts, don’t spread fallacies. It shows the world how shallow you are 

Depression is not a new thing. Depression is not 2017 compliant. The only difference is “the world is digital and connected and we get to hear what happen from one end of the globe to another in a matter of seconds”.

When I was in Primary school, a teacher, committed suicide by slitting her own throat and as little as I was, I still remember a  jovial, wealthy, married and pretty woman. It was her third attempt and she succeeded. Later, sketchy news came that she was barren and married to a popular wealthy man. She was battling depression for long and she couldn’t take it anymore. Depression and suicide is as old as the Jewish calendar just like racism in America but the difference is there is camera to capture a racist event in 2017.

And the association of speak out and talk to me, are making it hard for depressed people to speak out. It’s unfortunate that social media is full of decay coated in glitters and shimmers. We have not progressed to a level where we can digitally detect a lying post so we can thread with caution.

You, the Business Manager of a financial institution who gave out the names of your subordinates you considered a threat and watched them get sacked for absolutely no offence committed. They were diligent, they met their targets, they had fantastic appraisals but because you have the power to nominate someone, you picked your threat and threw her to the sharks. In her tears, you spoke to her softly promising to see what you can do yet rejoicing in her downfall. You have the audacity to come online to tell a depressed soul to speak out to you? The poor lady, whose job you took away and threw into uncertainty, whose life you rearranged and gave insomnia because she has devoted all her life working for the same organization, she is dejected and downcast with no hope for where her house rents or her kids school fees is coming from and you say someone should TALK TO YOU?

Hello madam lioness, vomiting fire and brimstone. On social media, people can’t comment on your post. No, they dare not make a simple joke. All sarcasm is lost on you. You are quick to tear and break. Condescending and arrogantly abusing people yet telling them to OPEN UP TO YOU. Who dare? You can’t hold a cane and tell a crying child to come closer. It’s impossible.

The volcanic boss, full of derogatory and debasing remarks. All your subordinates are afraid of you. You are the reason why someone is taking sleeping pills every day. You are rude and uncouth. You abuse people without having regard for their humanity. You are the F.E.A.R that lives in people. You are the reason why people are resigning. You have brought men to their knees and gave tears to a shaky soul. You see no good in your staff, always complaining and pulling them down. You too, you have the audacity to tell someone to OPEN UP? You, the reason why someone will still commit suicide in the nearest future? You are acting all loving on social media.

The almighty mother-in-law. You are dreaded by all your son’s wives. Your name rings fear. You are the one who decides the fates of another human. You decide how long a woman stays with your son. The rule is clear. They must worship you. The chocomilo mother-in-law. Good day ma. You too, who have made life so unbearable for your son-in-law to the extent that you went to pack your daughter loads from his house while raining curses on him. You want people to talk to you? You, the reason why another man/woman is slipping into the state of depression. You have suddenly become a listening ear telling all and sundry to come and talk to you

Slay Sister. Sister-in-law of life. Pepperdemgang. Scatter dem, Dem dey craze, gangster leader. You also want people to talk to you? You have suddenly become a preacher. You, that threw another woman’s load out of your brother’s house because you said she is barren. In the mightiness of your power and the majesty of your throne, you already passed a judgment of condemnation on a being you didn’t create. The infertility problem, that your brother is the cause because he has  low sperm count and has refused to go to the hospital for check-up. You decided enough is enough and drove another woman out of her rightful home. You called her barren, evil and witch. You taunted her and killed her with words. Every night, she drowns in her own tears as she waits to take her own life. You come here to say “Talk to Me” Who is going to talk to you?

Oyoyo 1, Omalicha, Osampete, Adanma, Adanne, Queen of Instagram. After you na you. You too, you are telling them to talk to you? Have you forgotten, your own blood sister, whose husband you are sleeping with, the same man fueling all your expenses. You took him away from your sister at least in the spirit as you mesmerize him with your sex styles. Your sister knows but she is too sad to talk. She is ashamed. She is contemplating suicide and you are here saying “TALK TO ME”

Uncle Bros, Six inches John Thomas. You have injured all the ladies in town. 56 abortions carried out by 12 women all in your name. You have slept with sisters and their mother. You have promised marriage to over 20 women. You have proposed with rings to over 5 ladies. You are the Lord of the rings. The reason why many ladies cry to bed every night. You promised them love, took away their dignity and now, you are blackmailing them. You have all their nude pictures, demanding money every now and then. Yet, you are surprised that a man committed suicide. Do you know the number of women you have dragged through the dark pit of depression? You are also telling them to TALK to YOU

Mr. lecturer, the randy rabbit. You have failed more than 20 girls intentionally. They must sleep with you before they can pass. That girl, who suddenly lost weight, is dying slowly because you will not graduate her. He mother is ill. Her father is dead. She took her school fees on loan hoping to graduate and get a job to take care of her sick mother and her younger ones. Yet, you are keeping her because she has decided not to fulfil your carnal desire. She is dying slowly; crumbling under the heavy weight you have made her to bear yet, you come online to say TALK TO ME.  Who are you?

Should we continue?

The Mummy GO, The Aunty Usher, The Choir Master…

Or the Facebook Group Cabals and witches coming up to devour a struggling and depressed soul. Ganging up against her and speaking ill of another in your coven. You passed judgment on issues you have no understanding of… You want them to TALK to YOU?

Until we learn to be involved in people’s struggle and take them as our own selves, NOBODY will open up to you. NOBODY will TALK TO YOU. You cannot hold a cane and expect a child to come near…

We all have work to do. It’s beyond 48 hours write-up and social media competition of who is the most depressed. It’s a joint action to stop adding burdens to the load of others. Instead, lift them up and soften the burden. If you have nothing good to say to people, keep quiet.